Donnie is not aware of this but while he is sleeping, I come over to the computer and write. I only write what I witness....
So, who was that guy in Appleton? There was this man who wore a white button down sweater that belonged to Donnie's father. This guy also wore his suit pants and his paisley out of date tie with a deep purple shirt. He was a fashion nightmare. Donnie Harbeck would have never worn this ensemble. I do remember Donnie asking John Thomas to go on his behalf. John Thomas said he would be happy to go on his behalf. "Happy" is a foreign concept to Donnie. Is it really possible that I, a writer, created a character or a persona who resembled Donnie. Even his hair was different. Combed to the side and no hair spray. Donnie Harbeck always wears a Las Vegas baseball cap. For most anyone who knows Donnie, Donald, Donn, etc, you know that he would never go anywhere without his Tresemme hair spray and brush. So, who was this guy in Appleton? Was it John Thomas?
The miracle that took place is whoever was in Appleton was happy. This man believed to be John Thomas saw life in a brand new technological rainbow of brilliant colors. He went to a memorial service and was able to celebrate the life of Donnie's Aunt. Just for the sake of argument, let's call this guy JT. JT was fascinated to hear how much his relatives loved Donnie. They knew that Donnie had become a recluse to them. John Thomas did not know them and they no longer knew Donnie. It was wonderful because it was like the first time everyone was meeting each other.
As a writer, it would take me a lifetime, to paint you the pictures that I witnessed. "If a picture paints a thousand words," than I would need an entire art gallery to even scratch the surface. Here are some of the highlights:
JT was able to celebrate and be filled with JOY that Carol, the second wife of Donnie's Uncle Ray no longer had to suffer. Donnie believes in heaven and now Carol and Aunty Barb, Uncle Ray's first wife live together in perfect harmony with a long list of other beloved family members. Donnie gets so depressed over the loss of these relatives presence here on earth. JT, on the other hand, only sees the joy. One sees the glass half empty, JT sees the glass half full.
Donnie loves his Aunty Carol. For years he has avoided her because of his shame over his life and the fear of her premature departure because of cancer. JT was thrilled to meet Aunty Carol and ecstatic to be able to report back to Donnie that she has been cured from cancer after months of holistic and cutting new exploratory procedures. No chemo. No radiation.
Uncle Eddie is Donnie's Godfather. He is dieing of cancer. Donnie has never seen his Uncle Eddie without a cigarette and a beer. JT was happy to report that some things never change. Both of them would want it no other way. JT hugged Uncle Eddie knowing that it may be the last time they see each other here on earth. He was so happy to let him know that the clock he bought Donnie from Germany and mailed while he was serving in the army before his birth, still worked and was one of his most cherished possessions. The clock is a hand carved dachshund from wood from the Black Forest with the eyes that glow in the dark. The left eye is the hour. The right the minutes.
John Thomas would meet and connect with Aunts and Uncles, Cousins and kids of Cousins. Jeff was in from Asia. Brian was in from Texas. Time and time again, no one cared about anything of Donnie's sordid past or his tremendous number of failures.
If John Thomas had to sum up the entire experience in one sentence. It would be: Donnie Harbeck is loved.
Does life get any more beautiful than that?
Glad that you recognized it John; now if we could only get Donnie to listen.
ReplyDeleteI love my mental picture of JT in a purple shirt, paisley tie, and white sweater. I never forgot the fashion-forward guy in the fuschia shirt and black velvet bell-bottom suit, in college. That was a bold fashion statement. It left an indelible impression. It's how I thought of Donnie Harbeck, all the years since college. I don't recall what he wore the night we were "arrested" on the roof of the science building. I know I was upset to be found in my royal blue brushed denim bell-bottomed hip-huggers and that yellow-gold Augustana t-shirt. I thought I looked a little "butch" in that outfit. It wasn't what I would have wanted to be caught wearing when discovered alone with a guy in a forbidden place. So when Donnie wouldn't agree to go back on the roof with me the next time, I made sure Heidi and I went up there in sexy skirts and high heels, and that with our blankets and our bottle of Sparkling Pink Catawba grape juice, we had four goblets, an indication that we had prepared for a meeting with some guys who just hadn't bothered to show up. And I don't know if Donnie knew this, but since we were both fluent in German and my German accent was flawless (result of all those years with the Germans at Foster Ave, do you suppose?) I spoke only in German and Heidi translated for the police. And I acted completely insane... which is what got me handcuffed and driven to the station in the squad car, with a night stick ramming me in the adam's apple. It is one of the highlights of my memories of college, and I'm so glad Donnie was willing to call police to "invite" them to my show. Of course, had I the wisdom of age, I might have realized we were keeping the po-po from protecting people from actual criminals, but at 19, all I cared about was getting back at the jerky officer who had stuck a finger in my face when the dean wouldn't let him arrest Donnie and me, and who had threatened, "If this happens again and I have to come up here, I'll FIND a charge, because I don't like heights." Well, to this day, I don't like police officers who feel the need to ASSERT their power. Had Donnie been with me the second time, he might have been embarrassed by the crazy things I'd have done or asked him to do on the roof. But I'm sure he wouldn't have worn that awesome suit on the roof. That was definitely a grubby jeans kind of spot. But I wore a backless, chocolate brown Danskin leotard and wraparound dance skirt with a white gauze and lace shirt that tied at the waist-- no buttons. No tights.
ReplyDeleteI recently asked Donnie if the reason he declined the second roof trip was a fear of what might happen to him in jail. He said it wasn't. It was the fear we'd both jump off the roof, next time.