Interview Process

Although medical professionals and social workers believe that I am unemployable and that I need to apply for disability, I decided to start the interview process.  There is a position at the Mental Wellness Center to which I applied for.  Having been unemployed, homeless, recovering from open heart surgery and suffering from mental illness, who better than me to be able to understand and relate to the clients.  As it is, I have already built a relationship with most of the members being a member and volunteer for nearly two years now.

When I was at the Casa Esperanza, a taste of heaven, the plan was for me to get disability, find housing and then when stable in my own place to begin to start the interview process without all the stress and anxiety associated with the seeking employment process.  As I am stable in my beautiful one bedroom apartment in downtown Santa Barbara, I thought that I should at least try to apply for this position.  One of the requirements is that the applicant must have mental health issues.  I may be one of the "craziest" people I know.  Thus, I might be the best candidate for the job.

It was never my intention or any of the wonderful care givers plan for me to be on permanent disability.  This may or may not work.  I was so stressed and filled with anxiety that I was unable to sleep a wink all night long.  The sad thing is I was interviewing with staff I have known for years.  When I had one of my nervous breakdowns, something snapped in my brain.  Too much stress or anxiety (no matter how much medication I take) can cause me to "flip out" or go hysterical.  It really is not a pretty sight.

As I look at it, I am trying to move forward.  If I am able to gain employment, I will free up the disability claim for someone else who might need it more than me.  This was not the way I had planned on making a career change but maybe "someone upstairs" had this planned all along.  If I do not get the job, at least I tried.  And if at first you don't succeed,

(everyone with me now)

Try, try again.