No matter how many medications I take, I am still a prisoner to depression. It does not take a major catastrophe or a death of a loved one to bring me to the pit of despair. Last week, someone stole the wheels off of my bike. I was able to handle that because I have another bike. However, when someone intentionally flattened one of my tires, I started spirally down that well. One of my fish died which continued my dissent into the darkness. Although my little female swordfish was not a loved one, I loved it just the same. However, when my wonderful card from my niece, Ashley Haynes went missing, I was besides myself. I was filled with anxiety as I panicked and searched my apartment. I was for certain I had left her card in the mailbox so I would not lose it. It turns out that the postman returned Ashley's card back to Huntington College by mistake. Hopefully, Ashley will return the returned card back to me.
There is only one thing that makes my situation worse. When people tell me all the reasons that I should not feel sad. PLEASE DO NOT DO THAT TO ME! It may take me longer than most but I will be able to pull myself out of this darkness. I always do. In the meantime, I welcome and covet your prayers. Thanks for listening! I love you for that!
You will have good days and bad days, loved one....but the one thing that you can rest assured of is the God stands with you in the darkest of places.
ReplyDeleteHere's my verse for today:
He found him out in the wilderness, in an empty, windswept wasteland. He threw his arms around him, lavished attention on him, guarding him as the apple of his eye. He was like an eagle hovering over its nest, overshadowing its young, Then spreading its wings, lifting them into the air, teaching them to fly. God alone led him; there was not a foreign god in sight. God lifted him onto the hilltops, so he could feast on the crops in the fields. He fed him honey from the rock, oil from granite crags, Curds of cattle and the milk of sheep, the choice cuts of lambs and goats, Fine Bashan rams, high-quality wheat, and the blood of grapes: you drank good wine! (Deuteronomy 32:10-14 MSG)
My dear, dear Jolene! You have become a wonderful pillar of strength for me. Although you are over 2000 miles away, I can feel your presence as I remember your wonderful embrace of one of those cherished hugs you would give. Although you are far away, you are ever present in my heart. The same is with Our Father in heaven, He may appear to be far, far away but in truth, God lives within our hearts. Praise God for Our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ and the presence of the Holy Spirit. You are forever a blessing to me!
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